Wednesday, January 12, 2011

old thoughts

lately i've been thinking a lot about the wisdom, power and special privileges that come with age.
and i'm talking octogenarian status.
i mean, you can tell when someone slips into 'grandfather mode.' certain tendencies start to show up that are basically unavoidable. for men, it's things like eating bob evans whenever you please and playfully harassing anyone that is paid in the field of customer service. anyone. wherever, whenever, and especially in front of loved ones.
conversations will go way too in depth. full names and number of offspring will be spoken of. bad jokes will weave through the air and eventually fall on deaf ears. this is just what comes with the age territory.
and ladies, well i think that the superpower of old women is the ability to touch anyone's baby, whenever or wherever, and nobody really seems to care. old women can touch baby's FACES on the bus. you know what would happen if a guy who looked like me just reached over and touched your baby's face? it either involves mace, night class defense moves or some sort of newscenter 800 hotline - and all of them end with all parties crying.
so, old ladies are untouchable when it comes to touching anybody. just look for it.

old people thoughts.


Me said...

"ends with all parties crying" hahahha! i just had this picture of you weeping while getting interrogated by officials! Write more please!

Anonymous said...

I just stumbled upon your post on Holiday Sands... thank you for the memories... you described it perfectly :)